Dating my Husband.

Yes my husband still opens the door for me. It’s not weird; it’s his little way of showing me how important I am to him. I have seen many marriages fail in my lifetime. Divorce is one of the most heart wrenching experiences for anyone to experience. Marriage is a sacred bond between three people: God, the husband, and the wife. These three people are the only people that should ever be a part of a marriage. When you start adding or subtracting; marriages begin to weaken.

A year ago, I was on a plane home when God put Nick in the seat next to me. A month later we began dating and here we are a year and a half later: married, home owners, pet parents, and still dating. We started dating and never stopped. Nick is the definition of a loving, faithful, Godly husband. I could not have molded a man better to spend the rest of my life with. Yes we have only been married three months, but since June 28 we vowed to never stop dating.

Growing with your husband is one of the benefits God gives to you as a wife. Your husband is your soul mate, confidant, friend, and rock; he is not just your roommate. Many people have told me “marriage is pointless, it never last anyways” or “once the honeymoon stage is over its back to reality”. Every time I hear someone say these, my heart breaks. I never want my husband to feel this way. Nick and I are truly best friends. We laugh together, we cry together, but most of all we grow together as a couple.

We are in this marriage together. Nothing is separate. We promised each other we would always keep the “spark” alive. I can honestly sit here and say after a year, I still get butterflies when he walks in the room, his smile melts my heart, and I love him more today than I did yesterday, but less than I will tomorrow. Almost on a daily basis I get asked “how do you make your marriage work being 13 hours apart”? There is one simple answer. I never stopped dating my husband.

We are that couple that makes people sick in the grocery store, because we hold hands and are giggly. Am I ashamed? Absolutely not! I married my husband to date him. On June 28, 2014, I became his legal girlfriend for the rest of my life. No one else gets to date my husband. We hold hands riding in the car, when we hike, when we are on the couch watching TV, shopping.. Every chance I get, I hold my husband’s hand. There is something in this little action that bonds us two together.

Before we got engaged we made a “date jar”. We thought up several different date night ideas, typed them on a piece of paper, folded them, and put them in the jar. Whenever we couldn’t think of something to do, we would pull a “date idea” out of the jar. Not all dates were extravagant, because we love movie dates at home. This jar gives great ideas, that we thought of together, to do as a couple and every time we do one of those ideas it reminds us of when we really were dating.

Dating my husband makes me fall more in love with him every day. I send sappy love cards to him and he sends me flowers every three-four weeks, just to remind one another how lucky, blessed, and thankful we are for each other. He opens the door and kisses me in public, but never worries about who sees or what anyone thinks because in his eyes I am the only one that matters. People never believe me or want to understand why dating your spouse is so important. The reasoning for this disbelief is that I have only been married three months, but my marriage is strong and exciting because we never stopped dating.

Every relationship is unique in its own way. I am no marriage counselor, but marriages are not just a name change and a piece of paper, it is a gift from God. Never take your marriage for granted. Some are not fortunate enough to experience it. Marriage is work but being with your husband for the rest of your life is worth every minute.

Misery… and it loves company!

Why do we consume so much of our life worrying about what others are doing?  The answer to this: We are HUMANS! People are so caught up in other’s lives because of one simple reason, misery. Sadly, misery loves company. Some live their lives vicariously by being a burden or bringing someone else down. They usually do this with the intent to build their own self up. But newsflash, it deepens the issue and makes the situation worse. We (yes, including me) are all guilty. Whether we want to be or not, we are guilty. We stay concerned with who is dating who, who said this, who wore this, who did this or that, but why? Why does it matter? Misery and it loves company.

We all want perfect lives. We want the best cars, houses, clothes, husbands, children, and the list goes on, but if we aren’t truly happy with whom we are, none of these “things “will satisfy us. Have you ever stopped and wondered who you really are? Stop right now and ask yourself, “Who am I”? Not your name or age, but deep down in your heart and soul, who are you? The answer to this question can be very difficult if you are stuck in the “gray area” of life. In order to be truly happy and content in your life, you have to understand and accept who you truly are.

You ask, “How do I figure out who I am”? It took me twenty five years to figure out who I am, and some days I still am not sure. Over the past few years I have endured what we as Christians call “trials.” Trials are classified as, “hardships” or”sufferings”, which Christians endure. Trust me; I have had my fair share. I have endured death, divorce, breakups, betray, and family conflict. Many times I wanted to give up, but right before hitting rock bottom, God took my hand and lead me down a different path. None of us are perfect, but changing my life is how I figured out who I am. I am a woman of God, a wife, strong, faithful, diligent, but most of all content.

Misery can physically, mentally and emotionally tear you down. Most misery comes from a “trial” or “hardship” we don’t know how to face. But the reason we can’t control these all comes down to confusion about who we are or what we believe. We can’t control the weather, other people’s relationships, family turning their back on you, or the economy crashing. However, we can control how we react. When you have a miserable person in your life don’t confront them, pray for them. Don’t accompany the source that breaks down most relationships and people.

Miserable people love others as company. The reason for this has to do with making their self feel better. They attack, lash out, are hateful, and disrespectful because it helps them release anger and frustration. In cases such as these, wash your hands clean of them. We have enough negativity in the world; ISIS, war, divorce, murder, suicide, we don’t need to feed any more of it.

Each and every one of us is given twenty four hours. Twenty-four. That’s not a lot.  Why would any of us want to spend it being miserable or being company to someone else’s misery? Choose to live fully the twenty- four hours you are given. Because the only thing in life that will run out, is time.

 

The Lord is king! He is robed in majesty. Indeed, the Lord is robed in majesty and armed with strength. The world stands firm and cannot be shaken. Psalm 93:1.

Remember Why You Started

Everyone has their own definition of fitness. The routine that works for me or you may not work for our best friends. Making the decision to become fit or changing your lifestyle is more than just going to the gym and doing thirty minutes of cardio. In order to get the results you have set forth in your head you must become fully committed. I will be the first to tell you it is a complete lifestyle change and results (unfortunately) do not happen over night. I have had several people help me along my journey and a lot of my success has been from their motivation and determination to help me. Some of the information I will share will be advice or routines that they have suggested or written for me. In these cases I will acknowledge them and how they influenced me.

Over the past few years I have competed in local, state, and nationals pageants. Most people think I became healthy and changed my workout regimen due to this, but I also have personal image issues and health problems that have also contributed to my changes. I, just like most people, have cheat days. You will not be able to drop every bad habit like a hot potato. It will take at least two to four weeks to start seeing results and getting into routines and new eating habits. You will have to wake up every morning and continually tell yourself “I can do this”. My main advice I give to everyone is never ever give up and always remember why you started. There have been many days I wanted to throw the towel in and quit but I always remind myself I started for myself and no one else.

I hope these can help you have the motivation when you feel like giving up. It has taken me three years to be where I am today. When I tell you I understand struggling, I truly get it. With that being said we are going to start a four week challenge together. I will post food ideas and workout routines. Remember the ones of you that are just started, you will have to modify your workout to your ability. Please do not get discouraged when you are fatigued or tired after the routines. If you need a workout partner or need a little push please feel free to email me or text me. To the person reading this, I have faith in you and you can do anything you put your mind to.

EVERYONE REPEAT AFTER ME: “I CAN DO THIS!”. Take a post-it note and place this sentence where you can read it every morning when your feet hit the floor. This month’s decision will be your next month’s body! Ready.. Set.. Go!

Before beginning our challenge I want you to take a picture of what you look like now. Every day after your workout take a picture of your progress and in four weeks compare where you began. Taking pictures helps me realize the results I am achieving, especially on down days.

Four Week Challenge : Day One (Leg and Ab Day-find a weight that suits you best) June 1,2014

Warm Up 10 Minutes: Stair Climber, Treadmill, or Spin Bike

LEGS

  • Smith Machine Squats: 15 reps X 4 (keep your back straight, and squat as low as you can)
  • Smith Machine Calf Raises: 15 reps X 4
  • Lunges: 15 reps X 4
  • Leg Adductor: 10 reps X 5
  • Leg Abductor: 10 reps X 5
  • Straight Leg Dead Lifts: 12 reps X 4
  • Hip Thrusters: 35-50 reps X 4 (no weights)
  • Wall Sits: 30 seconds- 1 minute X 4

ABS

  • V-Ups: 15 reps X 4
  • Russian Twists: 50 reps X 3
  • Bicycles: 50 reps X 3
  • Mountain Climbers: 50 X 3
  • Plank: 30 seconds- 1 minute X 3

Four Week Challenge : Day Two (Back and Biceps) June 2,2014

Some of this workout was written by my fiancé Nick

Back

Warm up: 10-15 minutes-cardio

  • Seated Row: least amount of sets it takes to get to 50
  • Lat Pull Down: 12 reps X 4
  • Bent Over Row: 12 reps X 4
  • One Arm Dumbbell Row: 12 reps per arm X 4

Biceps

  • Dumbbell Curls:12 reps X 4
  • Cable Curls: 12 reps X 4
  • Bench Curl: 12 reps X 4
  • Push Up Row: 12 reps per arm X 4

Four Week Challenge : Day Three (Chest, Triceps, and Abs) June 3,2014

Warm Up: 10-15 minutes- cardio

Chest

  • Incline Bench Press: 12 reps X 4
  • Cable Flys: 12 reps X 4
  • Inclined Chest Flys: 12 reps X 4
  • Flat Bench Dumbbell press: 12 reps X 4
  • Push-ups: 15 reps

Triceps

  • Bench Dips: 20 reps X 4 (body weight only)
  • Triceps Pushdown: 12 reps X 4
  • One- Arm Dumbbell Extension: 12 reps per arm X 4
  • One-Arm Dumbbell Kickbacks: 12 reps per arm X 4

Abs

  • V-Ups: 30 reps x 4
  • Bicycles: 15 reps X 4
  • Flutter Kicks: 15 reps X 4
  • Toe Touches: 15 reps X 4
  • Mountain Climbers: 15 reps x 4

 

Four Week Challenge : Day Four ( Cardio Workout) June 4,2014

Cardio

  • Jumping Jacks: 50
  • Burpees: 10
  • Mountain Climbers: 50
  • Knee Highs: 25
  • Push- ups: 10
  • Squats: 15
  • Crunches: 20
  • Butt Kicks: 25
  • Plank: 1 Minute

Repeat routine 3 times

Four Week Challenge : Day Five (Leg and AB Day-find a weight that suits you best) June 5, 2014

Warm Up 10 Minutes: Stair Climber, Treadmill, or Spin Bike

LEGS

  • Smith Machine Squats: 15 reps X 4 (keep your back straight, and squat as low as you can)
  • Smith Machine Calf Raises: 15 reps X 4
  • Lunges: 15 reps X 4
  • Leg Adductor: 10 reps X 5
  • Leg Abductor: 10 reps X 5
  • Straight Leg Dead Lifts: 12 reps X 4
  • Hip Thrusters: 35-50 reps X 4 (no weights)
  • Wall Sits: 30 seconds- 1 minute X 4

ABS

  • V-Ups: 15 reps X 4
  • Russian Twists: 50 reps X 3
  • Bicycles: 50 reps X 3
  • Mountain Climbers: 50 X 3
  • Plank: 30 seconds- 1 minute X 3

Four Week Challenge : Day Six (Back and Biceps) June 6,2014

Some of this workout was written by my fiancé Nick

Back

Warm up: 10-15 minutes-cardio

  • Seated Row: least amount of sets it takes to get to 50
  • Lat Pull Down: 12 reps X 4
  • Bent Over Row: 12 reps X 4
  • One Arm Dumbbell Row: 12 reps per arm X 4

Biceps

  • Dumbbell Curls:12 reps X 4
  • Cable Curls: 12 reps X 4
  • Bench Curl: 12 reps X 4
  • Push Up Row: 12 reps per arm X 4

Four Week Challenge : Day Seven June 7, 2014

 

CONGRATUALITIONS IT REST DAY!!! YOU JUST COMPLETED WEEK ONE OF FOUR! TREAT YOURSELF TODAY