As moms, 97% of the time we walk around in a fog. Or maybe it is just me. From the time my eyes open in the morning until the time I fall asleep, there is always a sweet little human that relies on me. Whether it be breakfast, school drop -off, wiping runny noses, kissing boo-boos, or just a quick hug in passing, I am constantly needed. I never knew what the word “selfless” truly meant until I became a mother.
As most of you know, Nick and I have moved and/or lived in separate states most of our marriage. Sometimes by choice and sometimes not. I am very fortunate to have a husband who works so hard and sacrifices so much for our little family. Watching his perseverance and determination over the last nine years has both humbled and blessed me. He has never given up on any of his dreams or passions. Not only does he work every day to be a better person at home, but he is also constantly looking for ways to improve and advance his career. Nick is the definition of a go-getter, the role model all men need when it comes to being a father, and a prime example of what a husband should be.
There are many days I struggle when Nick and I are apart. There are nights I cry myself to sleep from missing my husband and wanting him to be involved with our day-to-day lives. I long for the days our family is finally under one roof for more than a 72-hour weekend trip. I look forward to the day we are settled in the same state and town. Fortunately, technology allows Nick to be involved with as much of Atticus, Ander, and Addleigh Elaine’s lives when he cannot physically be present.
The last year I have personally learned depression is real. More real than I could have ever imagined. I gave birth to our sweet Lainey bug, watched my best friend’s mother pass away, lost friends, had falling outs with family, sold our house in Indy, packed, moved, and stored our stuff in Michigan, bought land, {temporarily… I say this very sarcastically} moved to Georgia with our children, and supported Nick with his new transfer…. 17 hours away. I realized what should have been some of the happiest times of my life quickly became some of my darkest.
I truly lost myself and purpose this last year. Somedays I would walk around in a complete fog and have no idea what I did or how I made it through the day. If it were not for my saint of a mom and husband, I am not sure how I would be where I am right now. I constantly questioned myself as to why I thought I could be depressed or have anxiety. I mean my best friend lost her mom and I was sitting here depressed over life circumstances that are beyond my control. Kelli and I were talking about this very conversation last week and I told her I could not believe I was even telling her how I felt with all she had been through. But when I tell you everyone needs a Kelli in their life (but you can’t have mine) … everyone seriously needs a Kelli in their life. Even with everything she has been through, she told me I deserved to have those feelings and no circumstance is more or less important based on the situation.
I have always been the “strong friend” or at least that is what my circle of friends say. I pray for my tribe daily {because without them I would not have been able to make it through this last year}, I root for them with any dream or idea they have, celebrate their success, cry with them during hard times, but I fail at telling them how I really am. I hide my personal struggles. I internalize everything and always have. Until this year, I never realized how important self-care and mental health matters.
Check on your friends, learn that it is ok to struggle, be content that all things will never be picture perfect. If you throw a dirty diaper in the sink at midnight due to pure exhaustion… laugh at yourself and pray for a better tomorrow. Life is short. Take care of yourself, love with all you have, and drop the embarrassment that comes with life struggles.
Shout out to all the strong friends. I personally know how you feel. But know, it is ok to struggle. It is ok to not have it all together 100% of the time. It is ok to ask for help. It is simply ok to not be ok. Give yourself some grace and keep pushing forward.
” Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petitions, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” -Philippians 4:6
Lacie Ross is the director for the Miss Hahira Honeybee Pageant held annually in Hahira, Georgia.
Among many titles, Lacie was Miss Georgia United States 2013 and Miss Georgia South 2013 where she went on to place in the top 15 at Miss Georgia USA. She has judged, directed, and competed in multiple pageants. Lacie even appeared on TLC’s “Here comes Honey Boo Boo” as a celebrity judge.
Mrs. Ross is a graduate of Valdosta State University with a Bachelor of Business Administration and a Minor in Human Resources. She also holds an Associates in Science from Georgia Military College. Lacie is very active in the community where she has held positions as a L.A.M.P homeless shelter mentor, Second Harvest of South Georgia spokesperson, team member with the Georgia Special Olympics, ambassador for People Water, committee member for the Hahira Honeybee festival, among many others. She is currently on the board of directors and choreographer for the Miss Georgia South Pageant.
Lacie is happily married to her husband, Nick, who she met on an airplane coming home from Miss United States. The Rosses have three beautiful children, Atticus, Ander, and Addleigh Elaine and reside in Highland, Michigan.
A quote by Audrey Hepburn is one Mrs. Ross lives by “As you grow older, you will learn you have two hands. One for helping yourself, the other for helping others.”
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